held a grudge for a very, very long time against someone that had caused you alot of pain? And a long time passes, and it still hurts, and you hope you never have to see them again. Yet, in the bottom of your heart, you know you're eventually going to see them?
But you don't want to. Because you are sure it will mean re-living all the pain, all the bad memories, all the hurt. For weeks before you know you're going to cross paths, you become more and more angry. Angry because this person has so much control over you still. Angry because you thought you were over it, but you're not. Angry because...anger is a secondary emotion, and really you know you have to face the music. Have you ever felt that way?
Finally the day comes. You see the person approach you. You exchange small talk. "Is this really happening?" You wonder. "Because I'm not feeling anything right now. I'm not feeling angry, or sad, or hurt, or any other emotion for that matter." As time passes, you realize they had become something in your head that was very far from reality. You actually sincerely feel absolutely nothing where there used to be pain. You're not angry at them anymore, because all of a sudden it hits you: you can't hate a person that you feel so utterly and completely sorry for.
It's amazingly liberating. Emancipating. Divine.
